I’m Lisa. This podcast series is the story of my mom’s decades-long journey from Cambodia to America. And it’s a long overdue conversation between the two of us, about our family’s history — through war and violence, separation and loss, endings and beginnings.

When I became a parent, my mom flew across the country to help me take care of my firstborn child. And opened up to share a story I’d never fully heard, about her firstborn child — the sister I’ve never met.

As the genocidal regime of Pol Pot and the Khmer Rouge takes hold of Cambodia, my mom and dad run for their lives — separated from my cousin, Lynn, who is then faced with keeping her siblings alive in a forced labor camp.

Reunited with my cousin Lynn, my mom becomes a gold dealer to support her growing family — and realizes that the charmed childhood she had in Cambodia is nowhere to be found for her own kids. She recounts the joyful memories that helped her hold on for more than five years as a refugee in Vietnam, before making the decision to leave both countries for good.

At the moment my mom steps onto a small fishing boat off the coast of Cambodia, headed for a refugee camp in Thailand under cover of night, she becomes the head of our family. It takes her less than a year to make it safely to her new home in New York, give birth to me, and learn how to be a single parent in the U.S. But it will end up taking her decades to process what she’s overcome, what she’s become, and what she’s left behind on the beaches of Cambodia.

Just before I gave birth to my daughter Acacia, I turned 36. And on my birthday my mom sent me a birthday card that was full of heartfelt words — more than she’d ever written to me before. On the last night of her visit to help me take care of Acacia, as she read the card aloud, I realized how I was — and still am — a part of the lives that came before me.